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October 18, 2014
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ADE Tourist Mistakes Amsterdam Peep Show For Benny Benassi Live Performance

An ADE tourist was left embarrassed after accidentally mistaking one of Amsterdam’s notorious peep shows for a live Benny Benassi performance.

Mike Bassant, a thirty four year old computer programmer from London, England, made the shocking mistake after taking a large quantity of MDMA.

“I didn’t know where the fuck I was,” admitted Mr. Bassant earlier today. “We started off in a coffee shop smoking a couple of blunts but I got way too stoned so I decided to balance it out with a bit of MDMA.”

“The gear they have over here must be a lot stronger than the stuff we’ve got at home,” observed Bassant. “I thought I only had a small bit but after about an hour I was walking around talking to random inanimate objects, licking my eyeballs and trailing my jaw along the floor.”

“I’ve been a massive Benassi fan for years now,” continued Mr. Bassant. “Well I’ve actually just been a fan of the video he made with all the bouncing titties in it, I’m not really too familiar with any of his other work but I really do love those titties.”

“Somehow I ended up in a peep show, I’m not even sure if Benny Benassi was playing that night or not but I totally had myself convinced I was watching him,” recounted Bassant. “I remember thinking to myself “this is very minimal” but looking back now there was no music at all, just a series of middle aged ex-strippers sticking an assortment of phallic items any where they’d fit.”

“I stayed for about two hours, I must have put about a hundred euros worth of two euro coins into the coin slot,” continued a slightly embarrassed Bassant. “I even started shouting one more tune when the lights went off and had to get dragged out by a full team of angry security guards.”

“After they finally got me out I walked into a public toilet,” continued Bassant. “There was a big smelly shit sitting in one of the toilets and I managed to convince myself I was a t a Calvin Harris show. Naturally I left as quickly as possible.”

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