Millions of US viewers of the 56th Grammy’s Awards were said to be “devastated” by the news that electronic duo Daft Punk are French. One particular Grammy’s viewer was particularly distraught by the news and has vowed never to be “duped” by neon robot helmets again.
“It hit me like a tonne of bricks, I was listening to Get Lucky on repeat since August when I finally started reading the names on the liner notes,” claimed Grammy’s fan Lance Davies, “I started reading the names and they had a French look to them, like something you’d see on a restaurant menu. It made me suspicious because I knew that the album was supposed to be made by robots and not some hors d’ouevre.”
“So I looked up the names on the Wikipedia machine and there in black and white pixels was the news that they were French…I think I passed out in disappointment around then, woke up some minutes later, remembered they were French then passed out again. My wife found me two days later.”
“I just feel a bit ripped off if with the whole robot thing as well if I’m honest,” he continued, “you think when someone says that they’re a robot that they’re telling the truth, but then they go and turn around and say they’re not robots, and more than that, robot/human androids don’t actually exist except in the films of Ridley Scott or as sophisticated sex toys. And then to make matters even worse, you find out that they’re French?”
“Disappointed is too soft a word to describe what I felt when I found out they were French,” he added, “I’ll never listen to Get Lucky again and will probably burn the papier mâché life sized Daft Punk helmets I made, both because of the fact that they’re of Daft Punk, who are French, and because they’re made using an arts and craft technique that has a bit of a poncy French-sounding name.”
“Now I know why they cover their faces and never speak,” he continued, “under those helmets they’re probably smoking cigarettes, sighing wearily and wearing berets.”
“And conscientiously objecting to illegal wars, like pussies,” he concluded.
If you tell me you dont know the roots of french house , Dj Falcon, Alan Braxe, Guy, Thomas, I would have to ask you kindly to drop dead of cancer.
Could you be any more of a pretentious asshole?
Its a satire article idiot, its called sarcasm. juesus freakin christ do you kids even pay your electricity bill? i may have been sarcastic before, but seriously, the ignorance of some fucking people…