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A Scottish chip shop has today been closed after it was caught selling deep fried ecstasy tablets. Reports from witnesses claim that local drug users, bored with injecting Buckfast into their big

An expensive middle class eatery in the London borough of Islington is set to close down this week to be replaced by a music venue specialising in industrial techno, bass music and

Techno-maestro, Chris Liebing, has slipped into a coma today after accidentally playing a track that had a BPM of less than 120bpm. Chris, who suffers from a rare condition which causes him

Perm-haired Hot Creations chief Jamie Jones is reportedly suffering in a state of anxiety after becoming unable to decide on a floral shirt to wear for the upcoming Sonus festival in Croatia.

A report released today has expressed the observation that nobody over the age of 30 is quite sure what trap music actually is. “I first became aware of the term trap music

DJs are now spending more time issuing public apologies for offstage antics than they are actually mixing. A raft of DJs have in recent months had to take time out of their

North Korean despot, cheese-aficionado and self confessed Cher fan, Kim Jong-Un today announced his intentions to “turn back time” by 30 minutes this August. Representatives from North Korea’s national news agency claimed

Following the news that its parent company SFX is going private, online music portal Beatport has been frantically promising its debtors that the company will “pay you next month, I swear”. After

1. At the end of the day, the biggest draw for any festival is the music, you can have the beautiful Adriatic setting, the modern bars, the cool people and gorgeous weather

Filthy-death drug MDMA was at the centre of controversy today after it was revealed that a 19-year-old Essex girl became a prostitute after taking a solitary dab of the drug in a