German super club Berghain is transforming its brand image in an attempt to move away from angst ridden purism to something more mainstream. The change comes via the appointment of ex TGI Fridays CEO Don Headhatcher, who wants to ’take the brand global’.
Significant changes are expected, most notably a revamp of Panorama Bar, which will see it become a multi media rumpus zone, equipped with bean bags and free wifi access. There will also be a ‘silent’ zone, where exhausted ravers can quietly rejuvenate with a quinoa and kale juice whilst updating their social networks.
The new brand changes mean it’s curtains for the infamous basement of debauchery, host to many secretive mystical sex acts, and the hallowed Wednesday night freeform poo fight. The space will be renovated into a clubber’s creche and Car Phone Warehouse outlet.
The music policy will also be ‘tweaked’, but the residents kept on. Ben Klock has indicated that “bleak techno has run its course anyway” and Handbag House is back. New residents include Paris Hilton and the fat one from Swedish House Mafia.
A number of promotional products are set for release, which include a set of collectable door staff figurines and a musky perfume titled ‘Club Sweat’, which combines the aromas of the old and new Berghain. Headhatcher elaborates “it’s a mixture of bubblegum, saurkraut and petula oil – I think we’ve captured the essence of our patrons”.