Magician David Blaine has announced that he is to transform Swedish EDM star Axwell into a reputable DJ for his latest magic trick.
The street magician, who has carried out some of the most audacious tricks ever seen, including making The Statue of Liberty disappear, spending 63 hours encased in a block of ice and listening to Avicii’s album True without laughing, sees his latest challenge as the toughest to date.
He told Wunderground about the impending spectacle, “I really wanted to push myself, and the boundaries of magic, for this latest trick. It’s going to be the biggest challenge I’ve faced since the time I spent forty four days in a perspex box without wanking, that was tough but this is the closest thing to impossible I’ve ever attempted.”
“I decided to ask my fans on Twitter what they would like to see as my next trick,” explained the deadpan magician,” astonishingly eighty percent of them said they wanted to see me turn a lump of human feces into a solid gold nugget, but I’ve decided to take it a step further by attempting to turn a massive shit into something that people will actually like.”
“The hardest part will definitely be making the transition from – overpaid, knob twisting, hand-waving whore – to reputable DJ that people who aren’t morons will actually want to see play,” continued Blaine,” because contrary to popular belief that actually takes years of practice rather than a two hour crash course from Afrojack.”
Blaine’s latest trick is set to feature in the hour long ABC special, Look What Happens When You Polish A Turd, which will hit the airwaves in July of this year.
Wunderground would like to take this opportunity to remind our readers that magic is not real, it is created by using camera tricks, sleight of hand and misdirection, we can assure you all that Axwell will never be a reputable DJ.
Axwell is a reputable DJ.