A geek music producer has confirmed that he is feeling extremely anxious about meeting “real people” at his debut gig.
Colin Reaper, a.k.a. C
“I’m not exactly a people person,” Colin told Wunderground this week. “The whole reason I got into making electronic music was so I wouldn’t have to be around other people, it was like being in a band, only without the band, so it was perfect for me. Now, all of a sudden, I’m going to have to go out and do what I do in front of people, which is really scary for me.”
“I know I’ll be fine while I’m playing, because I can just ignore everyone while I’m up there but I know I’ll have to get there a bit early to set up and then hang around for a bit afterward so I can get paid, people are definitely going to try to talk to me and I just don’t know what I’m going to do. I can already feel my heart racing just thinking about it.”
“I mean, there’ll definitely be girls there,” he said with a panicked look in his eye. “I haven’t spoken to any girls since school. I remember the exact day, it was 15 October 2015, I overheard two Year 9 girls talking about going bra shopping and I tried to explain to them why their boobs were growing, I got suspended and from that day my nickname was paedo.”
“I gave up trying to talk to girls after that, if you can’t even safely have a conversation about science, than it’s not for me.”
According to reports, after having a couple of drinks in the club Mr Reaper loosened up enough to try some MDMA, after which “he didn’t shut the fuck up” for the rest of the night.