It has been revealed that a girl who passionately claimed “Croatia is the new Ibiza” has actually never been to either country.
Twenty Four year old Alex Brodie, who works in the buying division for Top Shop, is said to have spent the whole weekend trying to convince her friends that “Ibiza is done” and “Croatia is now the place to be for true ravers”.
“A couple of blokes I know just got back from a messy Ibiza weekend but I couldn’t help laughing at them,” said Alex. “They wasted all their money on a place which has well and truly had its day. Nobody goes to Ibiza anymore, it’s a shit hole full of people begging, innit? Space is closing down, loads of clubs are getting raided and, apparently, it like rains all day every single day. I’ve even heard you can’t get drugs on the island anymore and that all the clubs kick you out at midnight, which is laughable. You won’t catch me out there that’s for sure.”
Wunderground asked Alex to explain why she prefers Croatia, “The thing is, I work in fashion so I know what’s hot and what’s not. I’m responsible for picking every item of clothing worn by girls aged nine to fifteen across the UK, so I know what I’m on about when it comes to being on point. True ravers go to Croatia now, it’s lit out there. Hideout festival, Sonus festival – that’s where it’s at. All the best DJ’s play these events. Even the Croatian Kuna is a better looking note than the fucking Euro.”
Wunderground spoke to Alex’s older sister, Gemma, with regards to her comments, “She’s a fucking dick” laughed the older sibling. “The girl hasn’t even been to a proper rave, let alone abroad to one. The Top Shop in Bluewater had a DJ play in-store for the day last June and Alex happened to be there for a new-line launch. Apparently she loved it and since that day she thinks she’s ‘like a full on raver or something’. Just ignore her and she will eventually change the topic to Love Island.”
