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September 12, 2016
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Hannah Wants Claims Dog Ate Her Music

Hannah Wants has this morning issued a heartfelt apology to Boddika for copying his version of Joy O’s 2012 Mercy, claiming that her Dog, Xerox, ate the hard drive with all her own productions on it.

“That fucking dog is the bane of my musical existence,” screamed Wants to our reporters this morning from the 9th story window of her Ivory Tower in Birmingham.

“Every time I try to push the boundaries of what’s physically possible within a music studio and hand craft never-to-be-repeated unique cuts of sonic innovation, that fucking cunt of a pooch decides he is too good for his 100% organic grass-fed pedigree chum and ends up eating one of my hard drives with all of my masterpieces on them.”

“And like I said, they are never-to-be-repeated! I was lost so deep in the music when I made them, I can’t even remember what I did.”

“Anybody looking to proactively push the scene forward or further themselves in their own music career, whatever you do don’t get a dog!”

“I mean what the fuck is he going to eat next? Chris Lorenzo?”

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