Leading leotard maker, Johnny Spandex, claimed responsibility for Eric Prydz’s success today in a move which has annoyed both Eric Prydz and the asses which starred in his video. The statement was made during StretchFest 2014, the leading trade convention for all makers of Leotards, Unitards, Multitards and Mankini. Mr. Spandex’s company, Next2Nothing, was giving their annual report, which reported an unprecedented increase in sales due to the ever increasing popularity of wearing next to nothing, when the claims were made.
“For years people thought Leotards were just very slow Leopards. However, since Flashdance and Fame, fortune has turned in our favour. Between people pretending to go to the gym, the increasing tendency toward women wearing nothing, supported by such internationally famous tramps as Miley Cyrus, and the surprise increase in Mankini sales, of course made popular by Borat and men who were born without the ability to feel shame, has made 2014 a very good year for us.”
He continued, “Of course, Eric Prydz helped us become more popular. But it works both ways. Unlike a Mankini.”
Eric Prydz was quick to snap back, like the aforementioned spandex, with a damning appraisal of the comments. “The song was good. It stood alone as a piece. It was intended to be an attempt to delve into the existential nature of humanity. It was about free choice. The ability to call on me, or not call on me, and the freedom contained within that choice. I’m not saying that having spandex covered arses in the video didn’t help, they did. Sure who doesn’t like arses?”
Many see these comments as an agreement with Johnny Spandex’s statement. Even Johnny himself claims this to be so.
“Spandex will be around far longer than Eric Prydz. It’s been popular since the 70’s or 80’s. For example, the people who starred in Fame are now, ironically, unknown. However, Spandex clothing is going from strength to strength. Which it has to, to accommodate increasingly strenuous work-outs being performed by dangerously unfit people.”
