US tech-house maestro Maceo Plex is reportedly charging EDM-gump Steve Aoki a whopping 60k per hour for lessons in how to be a credible DJ.
Maceo has reportedly been teaching Steve some of the basics of being a respected and revered underground DJ – which includes actually mixing, not throwing cakes around the stage like an overexcited clown and playing decent dance music.
“Unfortunately it’s not going well,” claimed Maceo. “I try to tell him to just mix one track into the other but he just looks at me with the blank look of a baby to whom you’ve just tried to explain quantum mechanics. The entire concept of performing a mix live is foreign to the typical EDM DJ as it requires attention that is otherwise spent gurning at the crowd or riding a raft.”
Maceo claims that Steve approached him last year around the time he was planning on abandoning EDM to jump ship onto deep house “for money” to teach him what a proper DJ does when performing live.
“Naturally I didn’t want to work with someone who has the respectability of Milli Vanilli but he offered me a stupid amount of money per session so I decided it couldn’t hurt, I also felt I was doing something of a civic duty if I could rehabilitate Steve Aoki from a garish, prancing fucktard into just a regular fucktard.”
Maceo is now taking down a whopping 60k per teaching session with Aoki but claims that despite his credentials as a top underground DJ he is unable to teach Steve even “the most rudimentary of DJing skills like identifying a vinyl, beat-matching and EQing”.
“It’s going to be a long struggle to stop him constantly wanting to leave a loop playing while he interacts with the crowd, there isn’t even an audience there when we’re rehearsing but he’ll put a track on loop and go play on a trampoline for five minutes while progressively shedding his clothing and screaming his own name.”
“He seems to think that that’s what DJing is,” he added.