Today: March 12, 2026
June 28, 2016
1 min read

Man Looking For Festival Ticket 24 Hours Before It Begins Can’t Believe It’s Sold Out

A young male at home in the kitchen looking worried while using a computer.

A man who was left frantically searching for Secret Solstice festival tickets twenty-four hours before it was due to start has revealed that “he couldn’t believe it was sold out”.

After trying, and failing, to buy a ticket for twenty two of the twenty four hours prior to the festival, David Alexander took to social media to vent his frustration.

Mr Alexander is believed to have wrote a two hundred and fifty word rant on the festival’s Facebook page, questioning the festival’s organisation and demanding that he be sold a ticket straight away.

Social media intern Vanessa Watts dealt with Mr Alexander’s complaint, she spoke to Wunderground, “This really angry guy totally lost the plot on our Facebook page because he couldn’t get a ticket to the festival. Early Bird tickets were released in January but I guess six months wasn’t quite long enough for this fella.”

“He was such a douche, he kept saying things like ‘a monkey could organise a festival better than you lot’ and ‘what kind of festival is this?’, I responded by saying ‘well if it’s sold out I’d say it’s a pretty successful festival and one that you won’t be going to’,” explained Ms Watts. “That made him really angry and he spent the next fifteen minutes explaining how he didn’t want to go to the festival anyway and that if he did manage to get a ticket he’d be doing us a massive favour.”

Mr Alexander claimed that he was “glad” he didn’t get to go to the festival because he heard it was “really shit” and he had a great weekend sitting in and doing nothing instead.

“I’m pretty well connected when it comes to getting tickets,” revealed Alexander. “My friend’s sister used to work in Ticketmaster and she still knows lots of people in there so it’s usually not a problem but I just couldn’t manage to get my hands on one last weekend, it must have been really badly organised or something.”

“I’m glad I didn’t go to be honest with, I heard the weather was shite and so far everyone who I’ve spoke to that went didn’t really have a lot to say about it,” he said without clarifying that he hadn’t actually spoke to anyone who went. “Plus, I managed to fix a shelf I have at home that’s been broken for like six months, so that was really great.”

Previous Story

WhatsApp Group Chat Sure To Turn Into Piss Taking Nonsense Any Second Now

Next Story

50% Of Jockeys Only In It For The Ket

Latest from Blog

DJ kink adds air fryer to studio setup

Kink Adds Airfryer To Live Setup

Much-loved Bulgarian House & Techno act, Kink, has this weekend added a Bosch Air Fryer to his live setup. “I fucking love it!” said KINK. “You can literally do anything with this