An Englishman has had his head partially melted while watching a video of Nina Kraviz mixing.
Peter Goff was rushed to hospital after friends noticed his head had become soft and oddly shaped while he was watching the video.
“At first, I thought he was having a stroke or something,” revealed twenty-three-year-old Diane Croft. “One side of his face was gone all droopy and smudgy, a bit like Harry Redknapp only not as horrible, but then I noticed he was starting to drip and bubble. His head was actually melting.”
“I always said that Nina Kraviz one was a total head melt but I never thought she could actually melt someone’s head,” continued Ms Croft. “she must have been being extra annoying in the video. I’ve often wanted to poke my eyes out when I watch her but I’ve never seen that before.”
Wunderground also managed to speak to Mr Goff, who is now in a stable condition, “I don’t know why I put myself through it with those Nina Kraviz videos,” he told us. “Well actually I do, it’s because I find her equally as sexy as I do annoying and no matter how much she melts my head I still want to bang her.”
“She has this little thing she does where she flicks her hair when she dances, it totally disgusts me and turns me on at the same time, a bit like tranny porn,” he mumbled through his half melted mouth. “The sad thing is; I know I’ll be watching Nina Kraviz videos again as soon as they let me out of here. I’ll probably be back in here by the weekend.”
According to Wunderground sources, other symptoms of watching Nina Kraviz include; wrecked heads, grinding gears, boiled blood, ruffled feathers and got on wicks.