The worlds of publishing and electronic music were cast into disrepute this morning after a police raid revealed that the Mixmag Lab was being used to cook meth.
According to Met Police sources, the Mixmag Lab, located in a fortified World War II bunker, is one of the most sophisticated ever discovered in Europe and could have been producing tons of methamphetamine every day.
“Have you seen that film Breaking Bad with the dad out of Malcolm in’t Middle in?” asked a suspiciously northern member of the Met Police during a chat with Wunderground. “Well this were just like the labs in that. It reminded me of all the factories we used to have up North before that Thatcher closed ‘em all down.”
Reports indicate that the Mixmag lab may been supervised by the DJ Seb Fontaine, who has not been seen since being discovered hidden inside the walls of Amnesia, Ibiza, earlier this year, after an extended twelve inch version of Saints & Sinners Pushin Too Hard and numerous empty packets of Monster Munch, Fontaine’s favourite crisps, were discovered.
“We’ve not actually arrested anyone,” continued the suspect police officer. “I were too busy looking at all that machinery to notice some little so and so slip out the back door. If you happened to be in’t area and saw any body acting all suspicious like, do us a favour and give Crimebusters a buzz. Ta.”
Mixmag have yet to comment on the incident, although a number of DJs, who have recently played the Mixmag Lab, have spoken out.
“I’m so glad this has come out, I was asked to play the Lab last year and when I showed up I was gagged, had a hood put over my head and was thrown in a dungeon with nothing to drink apart from Coors light for almost three hours,” revealed Sasha. “They told me I was being paid in meth and if I ever told anyone they’d track me down and kill me. I’ve been living in fear ever since.”
Wunderground also asked Ricardo Villalobos about a gig he played in the Lab, to which he replied, “Best gig ever.”
