Most of the DJing equipment bought as gifts for budding teenage wannabe DJs is now finding most use as “a very efficient place for dust and motes of hair and stuff to gather.”
Teenagers were utterly enthused with their equipment, mostly Traktor S2 controllers and Technics 1200 turntables, for the entirety of Christmas Day but the novelty wore off sometime “around 6pm when the Transformers movie was on the telly” or “as soon as they realised how difficult the art of DJing is and became ‘a bit fed up.'”
“Turntables are for your twenties and maybe your thirties, not just for Christmas,” claimed one disappointed parent who bought his daughter digital DJing equipment. “I thought she’d be completely committed to it, she’s always going to nightclubs and having regrettable sex with DJs after standing behind the booth.”
“They’ll probably end up in the shed, next to the pogo stick and telescope,” claimed one father. “If we can’t sell them or find a home for them then we’ll probably have no choice but to do the humane thing and have them drowned.”
“I thought it’d be easier, any time I see my heroes playing they make it seem so effortless, like they’re not even playing. It’ll take me years to get to that standard,” explained one disappointed fan. “I guess I’ll just wait until they develop the technology so that all you need to do is Tweet your track, do a smiley face and a computer plays and mixes it for you.”
