Unemployed music fan, Jonny Trayer, is said to be distraught after finding out that his favourite musician is set to make the shock his fan base by trying to sell his music for money.
“They should do it for the love,” stated Jonny. “I have followed him on Soundcloud for over two years now and not once has he asked me to pay for one of his songs. Now he wants me to buy three of the bastards, and no doubt they’ll be a remix EP too I’ll have to buy separately. How can he be so greedy?”
“I mean up until now it’s been free tracks, exclusive mixes, live cuts, you name it he put it out there for free,” explained Jonny. “But now he’s trying to charge for the music. It’s a slap in the face.”
Jonny refused to state which artist is responsible for this horrific and unprovoked attempt to be fairly compensated for their work, out of fear that the artist would stop thanking him for the nice comments and smiley faces he leaves on the artist’s tracks on Soundcloud.
A few self described “underground artists” were also shocked that someone would want to make money off of their hard work. “Music is about music, not profit,” asserted local man, DJ Lemon. “ I make at least four bootlegs a year for the love of it and I always give them out for free. People think that just because they coined an original melody into their track that they can try sell it.”
DJ Lemon and his friend, MC Buttcrack, explained how they regularly download their favourite artists tracks for free through a YouTube to mp3 convertor online. These high quality downloads provide them with the stability needed for their bootlegs which they then ‘create’ on a Piratebay downloaded rip of Garageband. “Every stage of our process is utilising free technologies. It’s our statement as artists, not cheapskates.”
Jonny Trayer is a frequent user of Zippyshare and refuses to pay for anything. Apart from his drug dealer, but even then he haggles the price down and still complains when he doesn’t get over a gram of his favourite green, claiming that he is “a regular.”
Jonny’s obsession with free things has escalated to waiting outside charity shops until someone drops off clothes in a bin bag on the front door.
Markus, a friend of Jonny’s comments “Yeah he loves a freebie. I once had to drive him to Oxfam in the middle of the night because he needed some sunglasses to look cool at his next rave. He even made me try on a slutty black number for his girlfriend claiming that we were the same size in the thighs and hips. I obliged gracefully. ”
