The quality of ecstasy tablets can be easily determined without the aid of special testing equipment merely by observing their chunkiness, claim the nation’s clubbers.
“You don’t really need anything other than a human eyeball and maybe a little bit of prodding with your finger to tell the quality of pills,” claimed 29-year-old Bristol-based clubber Jason Greene. “I’ve been banging pill for years, have come across pills of all shapes and sizes, and in all that time one rule has defined quality – chunkiness.”
Describing chunkiness as “how heavy and angular they look”, Jason claimed that all of history’s best pills had a certain chunkiness to them that set them apart from their poor quality, low-grade counterparts.
“You’ve got your classics like doves and mitsubishis, they all looked like they’d leave a weight in your stomach if you were to swallow them,” he explained. “Even decent pills like UPS that are going around now follow the same basic formula of chunkiness equaling quality.”
“I think they have to be chunky to fit all the MDMA in,” he offered.
“You might find pills like love hearts or rolexes that, to the untrained glassy eye, look chunk but in fact aren’t,” explained Jason. “They’re still a bit too poorly pressed and crumbly to be considered chunky. Chunky pills have that glossy thickness like they’re going to take your whole supply of stomach acid to dissolve, like a brick of Lego made out of drug and rave.”
Jason claimed that there were some other quality determining factors of ecstasy tablets such as “being speckled doesn’t mean that there’s heroin or pure MDMA in the pills, it usually just means they’re cut with random shite that the dye coating doesn’t cover”.
