In breaking news from the session community, all social occasions are now being used as an excuse to get on the bag.
According to Chief Sesh Gremlin Patsy White, any occasion that involves two or more people is now a perfectly acceptable excuse for “putting a call in”.
“It’s 2018, man. If you’re not getting on the bag are you even a real person?” White said in a catch up with Wunderground earlier.
“Once there’s more than one of you, it’s classified as a social occasion, and once it’s a social occasion, it’s a perfect excuse for getting on the bag.”
“If you play your cards right, you can literally have an excuse to get on the bag five, six or even seven nights a week.”
Mavis Donnellan, a former amateur sesh activist, claims that using all social occasions as an excuse to get on the bag is a slippery slope.
“I used to love getting my mates around for a cup of tea or to watch Eastenders and cracking on with an eight ball,” she told us.
“But it got to a stage where I was just inviting people over so I could legitimately get on the bag. I even started to ask people around to help me with the dishes, those sessions could easily go on for three or four days.”
“Things finally came to a head when I started to treat work as a social occasion, I eventually got fired for sniffing coke of the boardroom table, I didn’t even realise the directors were in there.”
