Steve Aoki Set To Drink Own Piss In Latest World Record Attempt
EDM superstar Steve Aoki has recently made the headlines after setting not one but two Guinness World Records and now the DJ has admitted that he has acquired a taste for record setting and plans to add to his already impressive tally.
Aoki follows Swedish laughing stock Dada Life, who recently set the record for the world’s biggest pillow fight, into the record books after he received the plaudits for such prestigious awards as “world’s longest crowd cheer” and the “most amount of glow sticks for thirty seconds.”
Although it seems that the Miami born producer was merely a bystander during the record attempts, which were in fact set by the crowd, he was only too happy to take the credit for them, much like he takes credit for tracks released under his name on Dim Mak Records, which are actually written by a team of averagely intelligent monkeys.
Aoki spoke about his recent achievements, “I really love setting records, it really highlights how awesome I am, not just as a DJ and a producer but as a human too, and I think it’s really important for the world to understand how fucking great I am.”
“I’m definitely going to set more records in the near future, I’ve really developed a thirst for more,” he said confidently. “There are some that seem quite easy, like the record for drinking the most piss. At the moment it’s only four litres, only an idiot wouldn’t try to beat that record,” claimed Aoki.
“So I have the guys from Guinness coming around for my attempt at it next week. I’ve been saving my piss in jars and I should have nearly six litres by then so I’m confident I’ll smash that one,” he continued.
“There are a lot of other records that I have my sights set on too, like turd throwing. My experience with cake will really help me here. There’s also most pine cones in the anus and most money made with absolutely no talent, although I’m still quite a long way behind Calvin Harris on that one but I’m getting there,” explained the DJ.
“My management team have put together a foolproof plan for me to break all these records, I don’t really understand it at the moment but I’m sure I’ll pick it up eventually,” he added.
“I feel that by setting these records I’m really improving my credibility as a performer and it’s such a good feeling to know that long after my music has paled into insignificance and been forgotten about that my legacy will live on through a bunch of totally irrelevant world records,” he concluded. “So if you see me on one of those ‘Where are they now?’ shows way into the future in the year like 2016, then hopefully if you don’t remember my music, you’ll be reminded of me drinking my own piss.”
This is fvckin gold! LMAO – you are one cunny funt bahahahaha