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September 26, 2016
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The Holy Spirit Ten Times Stronger Than Vodka – Claims Parish Priest

A local parish priest has claimed that he prefers the “holy spirit” because it is easily “ten times stronger than vodka”.

Speaking between sips of the aforementioned holy spirit, Father Todd Unctious revealed that he hasn’t drank any other spirit since devoting his life to the church in the early 1980s.

“The life of a priest is a challenging life,” explained Father Unctious earlier today. “I mean it’s still easier than a normal job but there’s a few vows that we have to take which really make things difficult for a modern man in the priesthood.”

“First off there’s the whole celibacy thing, it’s literally a pain in the bollocks and it’s proved to be a bit of a thorn in the side of the church over the years,” continued Father Unctious. “Then there’s the vow of poverty, which is a bit ironic when you have a look at the vatican and where aul Leo is living.”

“These things make the plight of a priest rather difficult but it’s a relief to know that in our times of need we can always turn to the holy spirit,” claimed the priest. “It’s actually a type of poitin we make in the baptismal font, learning how to make it is the first thing you do in the seminary.”

“It’s about ten times stronger than vodka and it’s the one thing you can always count on in the church to get you through tough times. Sure us priests would be nothing but a pack of money grabbing peados if it wasn’t for the holy spirit.”

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