A young social media expert has spoken of his “continued joy” in always being the “first, or almost first” person in his social media network to post the latest video and audio links of “the coolest new music.”
“There’s just a thrill and sense of ownership that you get when you’re the first person to blog about a track that bloggers are saying will be huge,” explained Tim Marsden, a social media marketing executive at a popular design firm. “I’m always trying to find music that tastemaking sites are talking about and then posting it to my Facebook or Twitter because it makes it seem like I’m in the know. It’s how I imagine journalists feel when they break a historic story except way more important.”
“The internet is all about bragging rights,” continued Tim. “Unfortunately I don’t really do anything worthwhile like charity work, sport or have an impressive and helpful job, so I have to find something else to make me appear like an actual necessary human being, and that something is being the first guy to share the hottest links.”
“A typical day involves spending about 4 hours on Pitchfork or Hypemachine looking for the best music that everyone else is talking about,” he continued. “I don’t really have an opinion on the music itself and often won’t listen to more than 30 seconds of the track but if it’s new, being talked about, and cool then I’ll definitely re-post it so that my mate’s think I’m a clued in legend. I think that it’s important to them.”
Tim claims that he’s a “massive fan of lo-fi indie, electro-pop, folktronica and techno. Although I actually only listen to one of those genres regularly but I re-post from all four genres because I need to appear diverse when in fact I’ve a very stilted musical palette and don’t really like much music.”
Tim’s friend, Alan, claims that his attempts to always post new music in a bid to come across as “a mover and shaker” are “pathetic” and “are getting more and more annoying. It’s gotten to the point where he’ll actually scour through his friends feeds to see if they’ve posted music that he too has posted so he can leave pithy comments like ‘totes posted that weeks ago’ or ‘yeah this is a hot track, it was even hotter when I posted about it WEEKS ago.'”
“I am actually in the process of ending my friendship with him,” concluded Alan. “Anyone who spends that much time on something as trivial as how he’s perceived online needs to cop on and live his life.”
