Shocking reports have just arrived into the Wunderground office today which suggest that a stoned young man, under the influence of the devil’s weed, has walked into a room and then immediately forgotten what he went into that room for.
Witnesses claim that David left the living room, where he had been enjoying a few spliffs while watching comedy panel show QI on repeat, when he suddenly left the room and scampered into the kitchen purposefully.
“I was in the kitchen making a sandwich,” confided David’s distraught brother Micheal who claims that David regularly gets stoned and engages in shocking behaviour like leaving the remote control in the fridge, drinking milk from the carton or laughing stupidly at Wayan brother’s movies. “David came in and made for the fridge but then stopped himself and got a confused look on his face like he was about to fart or had just figured out the plot of Inception.”
Michael claims that a red-eyed David stood like “a thoughtful dog doing sums” for a few moments before shaking his head and stutteringly asking Micheal “what did I just come in here for?”.
“I just laughed nervously and said I don’t know,” recounted Michael. “He sort of looked around and tapped his index finger against his lip while desperately trying to remember what it was he had come into the room for but it was like trying to grasp the wind or do sums if you were a dog.”
“In the end he just shrugged as if to say ‘fuck it’, filled up a glass of water and left, as if nothing had happened,” added a concerned Michael.
Reports from David’s stoner friends back in the sitting room also suggest that when David re-entered the room following his fruitless trip to the kitchen he “completely forgot” where he had been sitting and spent “about 5 minutes trying out different chairs and sitting variations” before remembering that he was sitting next to the remote control in the armchair near the window, but by that time had become comfortable in the settee and forgotten that he had forgotten where he had been originally sitting.
