The Union of Great British Mugs have categorically denied that their members are in any way more inclined to use drugs than any other people.
Mug spokesperson Billy China claimed that people within the mug community were “sick to death” of being associated with drug abuse and feel that this gives a bad representation of them as a whole.
“I don’t know why people are always saying that drugs are for mugs,” commented Billy earlier. “I mean look at me, I’m a mug, I’ve not got a mouth or a nose so even if I wanted to take drugs I wouldn’t be able. Infact, I don’t think I know a single mug who has ever taken drugs yet we’re constantly being reminded that drugs are for mugs. It has to stop.”
“Mugs can’t even walk down the road these days without being harassed by the Police,” claimed Mr. China. “Well actually we can’t walk down the street because we’re porcelain drink receptacles and we don’t have any legs but if we did the pigs would be all over us and all for the sake of some silly little nursery rhyme that doesn’t make any sense.”
“Mugs are basically being treated like second class citizens and we’re not even Polish or Chinese,” continued the irate spokesperson. “We all just want to be happy the same as everyone else but until this rediculous slander stops that’s never going to happen.”
If you or any of your kitchen ware have been affected by any of the issues highlighted in this article feel free to contact our confidential helpline on 1550-You’re-A-Mug.
