Berlin’s most notorious techno club, Berghain, has announced that all Mexicans are now barred from entering the nightclub after yesterday’s World Cup upset.
Germany, the current World Cup holders, were surprisingly beaten by one goal to nil by the Central Americans, in what is being described as the “biggest World Cup upset since Wayne Rooney discovered chips were banned from the England camp in 2010”.
“We’re totally heartbroken as a nation,” claimed one Berghain insider. “So, here at the club, we’ve decided to take it out on the Mexican people and completely ban them from entering Berghain, we’ve also removed all tequila and Mexican beers from our shelves.”
“We’re now a 100% Mexican free zone,” our source continued. “In fact, the only thing you’ll see in Berghain that even slightly resembles Mexican culture are gimp masks, which look a lot like those Mexican wrestling masks.”
Thousands of Mexican currently living on Berlin, many of whom are still up celebrating yesterday’s victory, are believed to “not give a fuck” about their Berghain ban.
“I’m glad,” claimed Alfonso Chivalles, pictured above having recently been rejected from the club. “I’ve been living in Berlin for almost ten years now and I’ve tried to get into that dump more times than Louis Walsh has tried to get into a member of One Direction, and every single time I’ve been rejected, just like Walsh. Now that I know I’m banned, I won’t waste my time trying anymore.”
While it is not yet clear how long the Mexican ban will last at Berghain, one thing that is clear is that, even when it is lifted, they probably still won’t get in any way.
Imave Via Nomadic Boys