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May 2, 2017
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Bloke Who Caught STI In Vegas Hoping What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas

Man catches STI in Vegas and hopes it stays there

A bloke who caught an STI while on a stag do in Las Vegas has returned home hoping that “what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas”.

Martin Smith, a twenty-six-year-old accountant from Richmond, Virginia, has reportedly decided against treatment after friend’s insured him that he is covered by the old saying.

“I’m pretty sure that I don’t need to worry about anything that happened in Vegas, no matter how itchy it is,” claimed Mr smith in a chat with Wunderground earlier today. “It’s like the old saying goes ‘whatever happens in Vegas stays in Vegas’, people have been saying that for hundreds of years so if it was bullshit I definitely would have heard about it by now.”

“My friend Pete told me that there’s literally some sort of forcefield surrounding the entire city that stops stuff that happens there from getting out,” continued Smith. Check best vegas online slots here. “Apparently, it’s some sort of Native American curse the Indians put on settlers back in the old days to punish them for wearing imitation headdresses to concerts.”

“I was getting quite worried because I picked up something really nasty while I was down there a few weeks ago,” revealed Smith. “But, after speaking to the guys, my mind is at rest, I’m not going to bother upsetting my girlfriend or wasting money on doctors. I’m sure the horrible red lumps will disappear, eventually.”

“It’s really quite impressive when you think about it,” claimed the accountant. “It makes me wonder if there’s any other places you can get a ‘what happens there stays there’ kind of situation going, like the storage closet in work at the Christmas parties, my phone when I’m drunk or the horse track on payday, that would make my life so much easier.”

According to experts, the only thing that actually stays in Vegas is the money people use for gambling because, as everyone knows, the casinos always win.

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