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Bloke On Pills Spends 9 Hours Trying To Figure Out Lyrics Of House Track – Still Has No Idea

A man on pills at a house has reportedly spent nine hours trying to figure out the lyrics of a warped vocal in one of his favourite house tracks, only to be left none the wiser as to what they are.

According to Dan Smith, the man in question, he was trying to figure out the lyrics from “that tune what goes do do do do dooo doooo do” so he could have it tattooed on his chest the following day.

“The poor bloke,” claimed eyewitness Rebecca Chiles. “He was really off his tits and he was trying to figure out what the words of some song were, he was literally sat in a chair for nine hours with an MP3 player and a set of headphones listening to the song on repeat. He looked so frustrated.”

“He was in a room full of people and he was trying to get other people to listen to the song too but nobody else really cared,” continued Ms Chiles. “I felt a bit sorry for him so I gave it a go but, to be honest with you, I’d never heard the song before and it was actually a bit shit so I just gave him back his headphones and told him I didn’t know.”

Wunderground caught up Mr Smith earlier, “That was a weird experience, I just got the idea that I needed to know those lyrics into my head and I couldn’t get it out. I was obsessed by it. One minute I was having a bit of banter at a party and the next I was getting told I had to leave because it was two o’clock the next day. I didn’t feel the time go by at all.”

“My head was fucking wrecked,” claimed the young man. “And the worst thing is I can’t even remember the name of the song I was listening to so I can’t even google it.”

According to the latest statistics, ninety percent of vocals in dance music are nothing more than warped sounds, deliberately put there by sociopathic producers to fuck with people’s heads.

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