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September 4, 2018
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DJ Booked To Play “Old School Classics Set” Finally Realises He’s Past It

A DJ who was recently booked to play an old-school classics set has reportedly come to realise that he is now “past it”.

Malcolm Howard, a.k.a. DJ Malcolm Powder, has enjoyed limited success over the past twenty-five years in his hometown, Coventry.

“This kind of thing really comes out of the blue for a DJ,” claimed Howard during a chat with Wunderground earlier today. “It’s not like you’re sitting around for a few years thinking ‘I’m nearly past it, I better make the most of this’, it just kind of sneaks up on you, one minute you’re being voted Coventry’s fifty-third best DJ, the next you’re getting booked to play an old-school classics set.”

“Now’s the time for me to try and make the most of it,” explained the DJ. “I like to think that I’m kind of ahead of the game, especially when it comes to myself, so if I’m only noticing that I’m past it now, I’ve probably got another year, eighteen months even, before everyone else starts to notice it.”

However, DJ Malcolm Powder’s plans to keep his career going beyond the end of the year may prove to be in vain, with most electronic music fans based in Coventry either already believing he is past his best or unsure as to who he is.

One twenty-three-year-old house music fan said, “Malcolm Powder? Who the fuck is that? You sure you don’t mean talcum powder?”

While another thirty-year-old techno fan asked us “is he still a thing?” when asked about Malcolm Powder.

“I just don’t know what I’ll do if I can’t DJ anymore,” Howard continued. “Well actually I do, it’s not like I ever really made any money from the DJing anyway, I’m also an Avon salesman, so I’ll just keep doing that.”

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