Dutch knob twiddler Fedde Le Grand has been advised to use CBD oil to try to stop his arms from spasming during DJ sets.
Le Grand, real name surprisingly Fedde Le Grand, is believed to be the world’s only DJ with Adult Spontaneous Spasming Hands Arms and Thighs Syndrome, also known as ASSHAT Syndrome.
“Fedde is definitely the world’s most high profile ASSHAT Syndrome sufferer, or simple ASSHATs, as we call them in the medical industry,” claimed Doctor Hans Wiper. “He’s a real inspiration for young ASSHATs all over the world, showing them that if you really put your mind to it, you can achieve anything, no matter how much of an ASSHAT you are.”
“Big pharma companies have been looking for ways to control the symptoms of ASSHAT syndrome for years but there have never been any major breakthroughs, you simply were an ASSHAT or you weren’t,” continued the doctor. “However, there have been a number of recent studies that show that using CBD oil can instantly reduce spasms to an almost untraceable amount.”
“Fedde is very obviously in the public eye and everyone can tell that he is an ASSHAT by the way his arms move during his DJ sets, but if he was to medicate with CBD oil and stop his arms from moving like that, no one would have any idea that he was an ASSHAT and he’d almost certainly be able to pass himself off as normal.”
While Le Grand is yet to comment on whether or not he will choose to use CBD oil to treat his ASSHAT syndrome, one thing that is certain is that he will remain one of the music industry’s, if not the world’s, biggest ASSHATs regardless of what he chooses.