Kanye West To Give Kym Kardashian New Pearl Necklace

Kanye West has vowed to give his wife, Kim Kardashian, a brand new pearl necklace after she was robbed at gunpoint earlier this week.

Kardashian, a walking advertisement for opulence, lost over ten million euros worth of jewelry during a terrifying ordeal at a plush private residence in Paris.

The celebrity, who is famous because cosmetic surgery exists, was reportedly held at gunpoint, tied, gagged and dumped in a marble bath while her assailants, dressed as police officers, made off with their booty.

Wunderground spoke to Kanye earlier today, “Kim is really shook up yo,” he claimed with an even worse scowl on his face than usual. “She got gagged, tied up and dumped in a bathtub by guys in fake cop uniforms, so that was just like a normal night, but then they robbed her.”

“They took all her bling,” He said with a tear in his eye. “I can’t be seen with some whack ass ho with no bling. You get me? So I’m gonna have to fix that shit up. I’m the greatest thing that’s ever happened to Kim, and the world, so I’m gonna produce my own bling, I’m gonna make some Kanye pearls, diamonds and rubies ain’t got a patch on me, shorty’s gonna get a full pearl necklace next time I see her.”

Wunderground asked a number of women if the would ever consider receiving a pearl necklace from Kanye, “Would I fuck” said Margaret from Dublin, Ireland. While Jen, from London, England, claimed she’d “rather eat [her] own shit than have to be in the same room as that prick”.

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