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December 7, 2016
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Lad Complaining About Missing Sunday Rave Had No Intention Of Going

A lad who has been relentlessly complaining about missing a Sunday rave has revealed he had absolutely no intention of going.

According to friends, thirty two year old brick layer, James Stokes, is said have turned into a “right irritating cunt” whilst trying to convince people to see Mind Against, who were playing a five hour set at Brixton venue Phonox, only to be told to “piss off” by everybody he knows, on the basis that it was “a fucking Sunday night”.

“Sunday night raving isn’t the one when you’ve got work on a Monday,” claimed James’s girlfriend, Melissa, who listened to hours of his bellyaching. “He kept saying we could grab a few pills off of his dealer and head up there for some afternoon drinks before getting involved properly. Maybe on a hot summer’s day I could be convinced to go out for a cheeky wine but travelling to Brixton on a freezing cold afternoon to watch a load of goons get fucked on ket doesn’t sound like a good end to my relaxing weekend to be honest.”

Wunderground caught up with James to ask what he’d have done if he had found a taker to go with him, “Turned my phone off,” he laughed. “I tweeted, Facebooked and SnapChatted about how annoyed I was to be missing this set. I was also texting my pals to see who fancied it, knowing full well none of them would come. Maybe in our early twenties we might have done it but not at thirty two.”

“Mind Against are sick but they need to have a word with a promoter who books them to play on a Sunday,” continued a moaning James. “Still, there’s no harm in me preaching on about it to everyone, to make it look like I’m a dedicated fan who would have gone but didn’t have a willing companion. Always good to blame other people.”

Nathon Woodhead

Nathon Woodhead

Too old to go to raves, too young to retire from them. Where does that leave me? Writing for Wunderground.

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