After Hours

Man With Completely Blocked Nose Still Going To Sniff Lines Anyway

A man at a party who has a completely blocked nose has come to the conclusion that he’s just going to keep sniffing lines anyway.

Billy Andrews, made the decision based on the fact that he “chipped in” on the bag and is hoping that, despite the fact he can’t breath through his nose, some of the drugs will still end up in his bloodstream.

“I noticed something wasn’t quite right at about half three in the morning,” explained Billy. “My right nostril, which is my snorting nostril, was completely blocked. I had no other choice but to hand all of the snorting responsibility over to lefty, who is a bit of a whimp when it comes to getting drugs into me.”

“Everything was going smoothly for whatever the time equivalent of three or four lines is,” continued Billy, who likens his right nostril on a good day to a Henry hoover. “But then I noticed lefty was starting to clog up too, it’s a total disaster, I’m after chipping in fifty quid for that bag and there’s still about half of it left.”

“I’m determined to get my money’s worth so there’s no way I’m gonna be passing up any lines,” he claimed. “If I sniff really hard I can create a little bit of suction, it’s not enough for the drugs to have any effect on me but it is enough to at least get them into my nose, I’d rather they were wasted up my nose than up the nose of someone who hadn’t paid for the coke.”

According to sources within the party, Mr. Andrews continued to sniff lines until the bag was gone, then, despite the fact half of what he sniffed fell out of his nose, he unsuccessfully tried to convince people to “go in on another bag”.

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