Former electronic music producer Moby has denied a recent report which claimed the animal rights activist was a skinhead.
Despite being follically challenged and living on the far right hand side of the street, Moby insists that he harbours the same level of hatred for every living human on the planet.
“Moby’s pretty clear about how he sees humans in today’s world,” claimed one source close to the New York native. “His opinion is kind of Orwellian in the way he completely lives his life by the mantra ‘four legs good, two legs bad’. He has very little time for people unless they think exactly the same way as he does.”
“He definitely doesn’t hate people based on their gender, race, nationality, religion or sexuality, he just hates people in general so it’s pretty unfair to label him as a skinhead,” continued our source. “If anything, he’s speciesist which, as far as I know, doesn’t fall under the skinhead remit.”
“He pretty much identifies as an animal these days, he very much sees himself as a Sphynx Cat and has actually started asking his inner circle to call him W
Reports circulating within the skinhead community suggest that Moby is not, nor has he ever been, one of their members.
“Are you joking? Moby a skinhead? Absolutely not, there’s no way we’d have someone like him on our books,” claimed one large bald man. “Don’t get me wrong, his money certainly would have come in handy at fundraisers but we never would have actually let him be a member, he’s got the look but none of the punch.”
Moby, who is currently believed to be regurgitating lentils into an orphaned cormorant’s mouth, was unavailable to respond to Wunderground at this time.
