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October 18, 2017
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One In Six Families Are Left With A Boxroom Full Of Budget DJ Equipment

The latest census has revealed that one in six family homes now contains a boxroom full of unused budget DJ equipment.

In most cases, the equipment has been left in the home by long gone children who gave up on their dreams of a career in the music industry to concentrate on life as a boring fuck, while in some homes, the DJ equipment belongs to middle-aged DJs who no longer have time to use it but are not willing on giving up on their dreams.

“It’s incredible to think of all of that technology just sitting there and essentially going to waste,” explained DJ equipment expert Nick Techs. “We’ve got all sorts of turntables, mixers, CD players, samplers, synths and everything else you can imagine. It might seem dated and obsolete but if you put McGiver or the A-Team in one of those boxrooms they’d probably be able to build a nuclear reactor.”

Reports indicate that DJ equipment is one of the hardest things in the world to get rid of, even for people who have no intentions of ever using it again.

Steven Willis, a retired bedroom DJ, spoke to us earlier, “I’d never get rid of my DJ gear,” he told us. “Put it this way, I’ve got four kids. Three of them are humans, the other, my eldest, is a wicked Kam DJ setup. I know that, someday, my real kids will leave home and go and do their own thing but my decks will never leave me.”

“I’ll have them in the box room, gathering dust, forever and that’s just the way I like it,” he continued. “I keep telling myself I’ll get them out and put a mix together soon, I haven’t done it yet but I definitely will at some stage.”

According to experts, if DJing’s popularity continues to rise at its current rate, every single home in the world will contain unused DJ equipment by the year 2037.

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