Reports from Nottingham, England, indicate that a pair of real life Sesh Gremlins has been found living in a nightclub basements.
BBC Wildlife expert, and sesh advocate, David Attenborough claims that the discover of living Sesh Gremlins is a monumental moment for modern science.
“This is a very exciting discovery,” claimed Attenborough earlier. “I haven’t been this excited about a discovery since we found Wombles living in Wimbledon. Unfortunately, most of hose Wombles are now homeless drug addicts, hopefully the Sesh Gremlins won’t suffer the same fate.”
Attenborough claims to have communicated with the Sesh Gremlins through a series of “grunts, hand gestures and bumps of ket” and believes he now has an insight into the life of a Sesh Gremlin.
“These particular Sesh Gremlins have been living happily in the basement of Gatecrasher nightclub for a number of years,” revealed Attenborough. “They appear to be thriving on a diet of fag butts, drink ends and empty baggies and claim there are Sesh Gremlins, just like them, in the basements, cellars, back rooms and toilets of all of Britain’s major pubs and nightclubs.”
Reports indicate that the Sesh Gremlins have been removed from the nightclub by government officials and taken to London, where they will be housed in The of Ministry of Sound and “observed in their natural habitat” for the foreseeable future.
