DJ News

Revealed: Dixon Voted For Himself

After being confirmed as number one in RA’s Top 100 DJ poll for the seventy second year in a row, it has been revealed that Dixon voted for himself.

“This goes against the ethics of the dance music industry,” moaned Richie Hawtin, who languished all the way down in twenty first place. “I may do a lot of self-righteous shit that makes people die on the inside, but I’ve never voted for myself in the RA awards. It’s morally wrong and extremely pretentious. Dixon is a bit of a prick for doing this, I’m done with him, I’ll probably even unfollow him on Facebook.”

Wunderground caught up with the reigning champion, Dixon, to find out what he makes of his latest victory and if he cares about the opinions of his industry peers, “Richie can do one, the Sake obsessed, black dot-wearing, wank-stain,” he confirmed. “He’s just well jelly that I won again because I’m the best. What’s that Richie? Sorry mate, I can’t hear you all the way down there in twenty first position.”

“I can’t work out why people are annoyed that I voted for myself? I like to win and every vote counts. I’m hardly going to vote for one of my rivals am I? Voting for the likes Jackmaster or Tale of Us would only help them finish above me and that’s not what I’m about. Plus, they’re well shit compared to me anyway.”

“I ain’t too bothered about making a banging tune or delivering the perfect set anymore,” continued Dixon. “My grafting days are over. All I want nowadays is trophies, rewards and prizes.”

To Top

Send this to friend