Real Life

Yard Overrun With Boys After Kelis Makes Milkshake

Yard flooded with boys after Kelis makes milkshake

A yard has reportedly been “overrun with boys” after American R&B singer Kelis made a milkshake.

Witnesses claim the yard became “completely impassable” after all of the boys in the immediate area descended on it following Kelis’s impromptu milkshake manufacturing.

“There were just boys everywhere,” claimed Lauren, a local girl. “That singer off the telly showed up with all of the raw ingredients to make a milkshake and, at first, it didn’t really seem to be doing anything but by the time she had it made the boys started to take notice and before long they were all in the yard.”

“I really didn’t think it looked all that special if I’m being perfectly honest with you,” continued Lauren, “but my boy was like ‘it’s better than yours’ but he never actually got to taste it so I really don’t know how he managed to come to that conclusion. If you ask me, her ice cream to milk ratio was way off, the only thing you’re going to get from drinking that milkshake is a severe case of brain freeze.”

Local boy Jon also spoke to Wunderground, “I haven’t got a clue what it was about that milkshake but as soon as I saw it I just had to get myself into that yard,” he told us. “I was supposed to be working but I just thought fuck it I’m off and sprinted all the way there. Luckily, all the other boys in the job did the same thing so I don’t think we’ll get into trouble for it. There were that many boys there that I didn’t get to taste it but it was still totally worth it.”

According to sources, Kelis has offered to teach all the local girls how to make a milkshake as good as hers but has insisted that she’ll “have to charge” for her services.

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