Music Still The Only Thing Worthwhile In Your Pathetic Life

Studies have confirmed that music is the only thing worthwhile in your pathetic excuse for a life.

“Selfie sticks, Instagram followers and your blog all mean nothing in the long run and music is probably the only thing about you that is worthwhile,” confirmed a source who went on to say that, “you should probably stop worrying about having a snazzy haircut and dressing well because you’re a bit of non-entity.”

“Every aspect of your being is tiresome and disappointing,” the source continued. “You could die tomorrow and no-one would care, but if you mistakenly turned off the music at a party then people would remember your name and probably rightly think you were a prick.”

Your nonsense job as a banker or hairdresser are not worthwhile, the source claimed, before reiterating that listening to nice tunes is the only saving grace that you have going for you.

“Trying to attract members of the opposite sex, washing your face and eating food are all superfluous to listening to music,” it was claimed. “You’re not a bad person but just a boring one.”

“Weirdly the 12 hours a day you spend on Facebook aren’t an expression of a well lived life,” confirmed the entirely accurate assessment, “and the only solace of your existence is when your favourite music is playing.”

“You don’t even have that bad of a life in your middle class bubble,” concluded the source. “Ironically your life would probably be more worthwhile if you lived in abject poverty or a war, at least then you’d have something to say about the world instead of taking photos of your dinner.”