A middle aged trance fan from Scarborough, England, is looking forward to saying “I told you so” to all of his friends as the genre looks almost certain to enjoy a comeback.
Patrick Carr, a proud North-Yorkshireman, has been claiming that trance is due a “return to the big time” for the last five years and will happily “rub it in the face of all the neigh sayers” if his prediction eventually comes true.
“It’s not rocket science, things come in cycles, why else do you think hipsters and the young crowd have 1950s haircuts and dress like they’re from the 1980s?” explained Pat, a small time drug dealer who has earned the nickname “Postman Pat” because he always delivers. “It’s not because they’re too thick to come up with their own trends, well it is actually, but not just that, it’s because history has a tendency to repeat itself, especially where trends and fashions are involved.”
“I’ve always known that trance was due a comeback,” claimed Carr, who claims he once thought he had psychic powers but later found out that it was just an STI. “That’s why I never stopped listening to it and have kept my ‘tops off physique’ by paying membership for a gym I never use and swallowing pingers every weekend.”
“The comeback’s going to happen any day now, I can feel it in my bones,” guessed Carr, who admitted that the feeling in his bones could be osteoporosis. “I’ve been practicing saying ‘I told you so’ in my mirror at home everyday. It’s a bit like that scene from Raging Bull, you know the ‘you talkin’ to me?’ scene only a lot more sad and pathetic. I’m getting really good at it now and I can’t wait to have to say it to all of my friends.”
According to experts, trance’s comeback could be one of the most significant things to happen to dance music this decade and could pave the way for other forgotten genres, such as progressive house and trip-hop, to follow suit.
