World renowned dickhead and questionable rapper Chris Brown has reportedly been arrested on suspicion of being a cunt.
Brown, best known for his involvement in woman beating and rape accusations, was picked up by police officers following accusations of “life-time cuntishness” were made against him early last week.
According to Wunderground sources, Brown, twenty nine, has always been a cunt, despite managing to fool some people into believing he wasn’t for large periods of his life.
Matt Burrows, who grew up close to Brown in Tappahannock, Virginia, claimed that he always suspected Brown was a cunt during their formative years.
“Well, I guess Chris was just one of these people who was born a bit of a cunt,” he told Wunderground. “From a very young age it was clear to me, and a group of other kids our age that he was a cunt, there were certain cuntish things that he would do, like spitting at people, robbing stuff and having a nasty little cunt attitude, that really gave him away.”
“He got pretty good at hiding it when he grew up a bit, but there’s an old saying that goes ‘once a cunt always a cunt’ so I guess it was always going to come out eventually, it’s just a pity that so many people had to be hurt before it did.”
According to Big Jimbo, an inmate in Sussex 1 State Prison, Waverly, Virginia, he and his fellow inmates are looking forward to helping Brown feel at home when he arrives in the prison.
Brown has yet to respond to the allegations, although it won’t really make any difference if he does or not, because everyone already knows he’s a cunt.