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September 14, 2016
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DJ’s Dick Falls Off After Failing To Respond To Facebook Chain Letter

An unfortunate English DJ has reportedly lost his dick after failing to respond to a Facebook chain letter.

Reports suggest that Michael Cox, a.k.a. DJ Micky Cox’s, penis simply “fell off” on Sunday night after the DJ failed to act upon a message he received on the social network within five days of opening it.

“Mickey’s in a bad way, as I’m sure you can imagine. One minute he was fully dicked and the next minute he was dickless, it’s a lot to get your head around,” claimed house mate Martin Spiers. “What do you say to a man whose dick has fallen off? We’ve just been sitting around saying nothing for the last three days, the only way it could be any more awkward in the house would be if he’d caught me using his dismembered cock as a toothbrush.”

”He was joking about some stupid message he got on Facebook last week, he was supposed to share it with ten people or something terrible would happen,” revealed Spiers. “I told him he should do it and not to mess with powers he didn’t understand but he just laughed it off and said it was stupid, well, who’s laughing now?”

“No good has ever come out of chain letters, although, it might not be all bad, I’m pretty sure his bird has a thing for me, she’s well fit, and now that he’s got no dick she’s going to be looking for someone else to satisfy her needs. I think I’ll leave my bedroom door open tonight.”

According to ninety percent of people who know the DJ, it “couldn’t have happened to a nicer bloke”, with most believing that Cox won’t miss his penis at all because he is a “massive bellend” anyway.

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