A man who has spent the last twenty years living under a rock has revealed plans to visit Space, Ibiza, this summer.
Peter Flint, a geologist from Blackrock, Dublin, is hoping to catch a Concorde to the party island to cut back on travel time and free up extra time to spend at the iconic club.
“I’ve led a very sheltered life,” explained Mr Flint earlier. “I’ve been under a rock for the last twenty years so I’ve got quite a lot of things that I want to do with my life and I’ve decided that now is the time to do them, I’m not getting any younger so it’s time to start ticking a few things off old the bucket list while I’m still young enough to do them.”
“Ever since I was a little boy, I’ve wanted to go to Space, Ibiza, so that’s definitely gonna be the first thing on my list,” claimed the geologist. “I’ll probably end up spending about ten million Pesetas while I’m over there but I don’t care, I actually bought some shares in Xtra-Vision back in the nineties so I’m planning on cashing them in and living the high life for a while.”
“I’m also a big Leeds United fan so I’m hoping to get over and watch a couple of Premier League games at Elland Road,” continued Flint. “And, hopefully, while I’m over there, I’ll get to Cream in Liverpool or the Hacienda in Manchester, that’ll knock quite a few things off my list and make me a pretty happy bloke.”
Since going to press, Mr Flint is believed to have gone back under his rock after hearing he will not be able to carry out his plans, friends reported the geologist saying “the world is fucked” and that “some things never change”.