Graham

The world’s first Buckfast powered car has reportedly broken the land speed record while taking its first ever test drive. The car, which was developed by a “mad cunt from Scotland”, is

A tech house producer has taken to social media to brag about the fact that he managed to make a whopping ten tracks in just one day. Steven Hamilton, aka Sham, claims

A DJ has been left standing frustratedly at a bar after completely forgetting how to buy his own drinks. The DJ, who hasn’t bought a drink for himself in over twenty years,

An American software engineer has today confirmed that the latest version of Virtual DJ is so advanced, it actually shows up at your house and DJs for you. Ron Spellman, who was

A bloke who is paid to play music in a restaurant while people eat is under the illusion that people are actually listening to him. Alan Lafferty, a self-titled “tune technician”, believes

A full-time music producer has admitted that he is also working somewhere in the region of forty hours per week in Tesco to help subsidise his modest lifestyle. Raymond Parks, aka Parks

A UK based promoter who has spent much of the last twenty years talking shit about the parties he runs has reportedly fully morphed from a human into a Fat Shit. Medical

A DJ who has been suffering from a fast food addiction has admitted to having a massive chip on his shoulder as a result of his disorder. Barry McCaffrey, aka DJ Big

A bloke in a nightclub has shown a total disregard for a nightclub’s no phone policy by constantly using his phone to update Instagram about how good the no phone policy is.

The world’s wildest party brand, elrow, is set to crack down on a gang of illegal face painters who have been operating at a number of their recent parties. Bosses at elrow,