A man who claimed that taking down his tent after a recent festival was ”impossible”, has been revealed as a fraud after admitting that he just “couldn’t be arsed”.
Paul Whelan claimed that he was in a “delicate” state when leaving the festival and decided, in the heat of the moment, that taking his tent down and packing it up would be an “impossible task”.
“I don’t really regret leaving my tent behind,” answered Whelan when quizzed about the incident. “It’s not the first tent I’ve ever lost to a festival and it certainly won’t be the last but, looking back at it now, I think I may have been over reacting when I said that it was going to be impossible to take the tent down.”
“I hadn’t really had much sleep over the course of the weekend and when it came to the time to leave it definitely seemed like a mammoth task but, if my brain wasn’t being hampered by the last of the drugs leaving my system and the thoughts of my own bed, I’m pretty sure that I could have taken it down,” continued Whelan. “The truth is, I just couldn’t have been arsed taking down, its monetary value was far outweighed by the actual effort of doing it so I decided to cut my loses and made for the carpark.”
According to festival volunteer worker Sam Richardson, Mr Whelan’s tent was one of many that was left erect in the festival’s camping area.
“Yeah I think I remember that tent alright,” confirmed Richardson. “It was actually quite easy to take down because it hadn’t been put up properly in the first place. I had it down and packed away in about four of five minutes. The most impossible thing about it was trying to finish off all the the drink and drugs I found in it but, to be honest, that was pretty easy too I had them done and dusted in no time.”