1 In 4 STIs Linked To DJs
The latest research has confirmed that as many as one in every four STIs contracted in the UK is linked to a DJ. The research, carried out by some bloke called Tony,
Boring Cunt Really Hoping Muscles Make Up For Lack Of Personality
A boring cunt is believed to have spent approximately 1,500 Hours in the gym in the hope that big muscles will make up for his lack of personality. Paul Watkins, a protein
Ibiza Airport Install Series Of Hoops For Brits To Jump Through After Brexit
Ibiza airport has installed a series of hoops that British tourists will be expected to jump through to gain access to the island after Brexit. According to Juan Martinez, Operations Manager of
Banter Now Illegal In More Than 50 Countries
According to the latest reports, banter is now illegal in more than fifty countries around the world and even punishable by death in some areas. International law expert Anthony Montana spoke to
Bloke Fails To Change Boxers Once During Week In Ibiza
A young man has today revealed that he once managed to go an entire week in Ibiza without once changing his boxer shorts. Darren McGrath, twenty-three, claims the unhygienic event happened during
Ibiza Airport Burger King Awarded Michelin Star
Ibiza Airport’s Burger King restaurant has become the latest establishment on the island to be awarded the prestigious Michelin Star accolade. Representatives from the Michelin Guide claimed the decision has been made
Scottish Lad To Wear His “Good Shirt” Out For 10th Consecutive Weekend
A Scottish lad has revealed plans to wear his “good shirt” out for the tenth consecutive weekend. Anthony Fitzpatrick shocked absolutely no one by revealing his outfit ahead of a “big weekend
Chinese Moon Probe Discovers “New Ibiza” On Dark Side Of Moon
A Chinese probe recently sent to observe the dark side of the moon has reportedly discovered the next “new Ibiza”. A spokesperson for Chinese Lunar Exploration Program revealed that the probe has
Fyre Festival’s Andy King Tells Ibiza Clubbers €12 Is “Small Price To Pay For Water”
Former Fyre Festival employee Andy King has told Ibiza clubbers that €12 is an extremely small price to pay for a bottle of water. King, who was recently named the patron saint
Ibiza Worker Spends 54 Days In Bed After Returning To UK
An Ibiza worker is reportedly nearly ready to get up after spending fifty-four days in bed following her return to the UK. Kirsty Tompkins, a twenty-six-year-old shot girl, has reportedly text her