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News emerging from your house this evening suggests that your Mum has been keen to let everyone know how much she loves “that deep house”. Reports indicate that your Mum first realised

A young man who took ten tabs of ecstasy last night is having trouble figuring out why he is feeling depressed today. 21-year-old David Williams reportedly cut off his pony tail off

An Irish party girl is having a “total fucking conniption” this morning after waking up and forgetting whereabouts on her head her eyebrows were supposed to be. Jess Harris, a 19-year-old beauty

A man in a bar has been accused of harbouring racist feelings by a group of overzealous middle class finger pointers after ordering a white russian. The 43-year-old father of three, reportedly

During an intense pre-gaming session in his house before hitting the club, 24-year-old Chris Wicke, made the claim that he was going to “own the dance floor” – causing suspicion that he

New research released today has concluded that 90% of people only take drugs to keep themselves awake through the after party. People who take drugs, rather than being feckless, shifty reprobates with

A self-confessed old skooler has today admitted that he doesn’t even attempt to listen to new music in case it’s shit. Alex Loughby from Leeds, made the admission this morning when a

A fan of British synth poppers Hot Chip has had his lips mildly burned after listening to the band’s latest album. Adam Buxwell was enjoying the British band’s latest offering at a

There was widespread shock this morning when a self-confessed Bob Marley fanatic was revealed to be unable to skin a spliff. 25-year-old Jim Hutch, a white guy who wears his head in

Scientists at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology have today unveiled groundbreaking new research that reveals a link between being into psytrance and not showering. The team at MIT, who earlier this year