Scene

Price Of Balloons Will Rise With Inflation, Warn Experts

The price of balloons is set to rise in line with inflation, say economists, balloon experts, and drug dealers. “Any balloon will rise with inflation – that’s common sense” claimed James Sheridan,

May 1, 2023

Culture·Scene

This Festival Announced A Similar Line-Up To Everybody Else, And It’s Apparently Worth Writing A News Piece About

This bog standard festival has announced the same shit they announce every year, and we’re going to pay talented people with hopes and dreams, and better places to be, to sit down

March 31, 2023

Festivals·Scene

Ticket Tout Retires Due To Lack Of Support From Music Industry

London-based ticket tout Chris Mackie has this morning announced he may never return to his lifelong passion of scalping tickets and slightly diminishing concert-attendees overall enjoyment of events. “I’ll be honest with

May 2, 2021

Scene

“Virtual Festivals Aren’t Really Festivals” Claim Anyone Capable Of Thought

The internet today collectively gave up on “virtual festivals” after accepting they are nothing of the sort. “A chat window and a badly-shot DJ stream is not the same as being in

July 17, 2020

Scene

Paying Extra £20 For Ticket Does Not Make You A VIP

A report from the clubbing industry has found that paying an extra £20 for your ticket does not make you a VIP. The news comes as a shock to many people who

September 18, 2019

Clubs·Scene

Cercle To Livestream From The White House

Electronic music livestreamer Cercle has announced that they are to stream a DJ set from the White House this December. The livestream broadcaster, known for streaming from some of the world’s most

September 17, 2019

Online·Scene

English Town Now Has More Promoters Than People

Reports are emerging that suggest a small English town is now home to more promoters than people. The town, Barrows Gate, is located one hundred and fifty miles north of London and

September 17, 2019

Promoters·Scene

Police Called After Gang Of Ravers Show Up At Wrong Orchestra Show

Police have been called to an Egnlish theatre after a group of rowdy ravers showed up for the wrong orchestra show. The ravers, who have been described as “oldschool and slightly scaldy”,

September 13, 2019

Scene

Archeologists Uncover Gabber Then Bury It Again

In recent news, a group of Oxford archeology students have discovered the oldest recorded version of gabber. The class were astounded to hear the distorted sounds of a pitch-shifted bass blaring from

August 28, 2019

Music·Scene

Scotland Set To Introduce 6 Day Weekend

The Scottish government are reportedly set to introduce legislation that will see the weekend increased to six days. According to one member of parliament, reducing the workweek to just one day will

July 24, 2019

Scene

Price Of Balloons Will Rise With Inflation, Warn Experts

This Festival Announced A Similar Line-Up To Everybody Else, And It’s Apparently Worth Writing A News Piece About

Ticket Tout Retires Due To Lack Of Support From Music Industry

“Virtual Festivals Aren’t Really Festivals” Claim Anyone Capable Of Thought

Paying Extra £20 For Ticket Does Not Make You A VIP

Cercle To Livestream From The White House

English Town Now Has More Promoters Than People

Police Called After Gang Of Ravers Show Up At Wrong Orchestra Show

Archeologists Uncover Gabber Then Bury It Again

Scotland Set To Introduce 6 Day Weekend

Rethinking Your Investment in 4 Comet Works: A Buyer’s Guide

Move D @ Panoramabar (27.3.2011)

Danny Tenaglia “Resigns” from DJing Through Facebook Rant

J Dilla Mum Talks About Dilla, Detroit and Dilla’s Love for House