Man Driving 3 Litre Jeep To Festival Definitely Won’t Leave His Tent Behind
A man who plans on driving a three-litre jeep to a festival this weekend is adamant that he will be taking his tent home with him at the end. Peter Wade, whose
Woman Who Tried To Replace Partying With Exercise Decides To Go Back To Partying
A twenty eight year old woman who used exercise to fill the void left in her life when she quit partying, has reportedly decided to go back to partying. Claire Davis, a
English Town Now Has More Promoters Than People
Reports are emerging that suggest a small English town is now home to more promoters than people. The town, Barrows Gate, is located one hundred and fifty miles north of London and
Bloke Who’s Been Raving For 15 Years Still Can’t Tell Difference Between House And Techno
A man who has been going to raves for approximately fifteen years has today admitted that he is still unsure about the differences between house and techno. Andy Gallagher, know known locally
Man Who Can’t Afford Rent Happy To Blow £200 On Night Out
A man who is struggling to make this month’s rent is reportedly ready to “smash the pants off” another £200 night out this weekend. Martin Oliver, a bank clerc from Stoke-on-Trent, is
Promoter Claims Tiny Shithole Is Intimate And Bespoke
A local promoter has hit back at critics by claiming that a club which has been labelled as a “tiny shithole” is actually an intimate and bespoke venue. Warren Davis, who runs
Promoter Thinks Gender Equality Is Making Both Male & Female DJs Sell The Same Amount Of Tickets
A local promoter has claimed to be 100% behind gender equality in the music industry by insisting that both male and female DJs must sell the exact same amount of tickets to
DJ Demands Bigger Font on Lineup Before Leaving Womb
An unborn fetus who is expected to eventually grow into a DJ is apparently refusing to be born until the midwife signs off on a bigger font for the artwork to announce
Ryanair To Charge DJs Extra For Emotional Baggage
According to the latest rumours from the aviation industry, Ryanair are set to start charging DJs additional fees for emotional baggage. It is believed that touring DJs currently make up approximately 24%
Man Who Put Hands Up For Detroit 10 Years Ago Still Has Them Up
A man who put his hands up for Detroit in late 2009 is believed to still have his arms in the air almost a full decade later. Antoine Clancy, a thirty-two-year-old from